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Humour

This tag is associated with 12 posts

The things China banned in 2014, including adultery, Ramadan, and puns


In 2013, China’s Communist Party, led by Xi Jinping, silenced human rights defenders and popular internet voices, while also setting new austerity rules for party members. This year, the crackdown became even more expansive, as Xi worked overtime to oust corrupt officials and jail moderate critics. But it also started to get decidedly weird, as China rolled out restrictive new … Continue reading

Tibet: Train journey to Lhasa


This is the second in a series detailing a trip to Everest Base Camp (Tibet), which started in Beijing and an ass-busting walk along The Great Wall  (1). My travelling companions and I, suitably chuffed from our successful exertions,  flew to Xining for some preliminary acclimatisation. Beijing is not much over 40 metres above sea level … Continue reading

The two-cow theory: Capitalism in America, China and around the world


Traditional Capitalism: You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. Your herd multiplies and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the income. American Capitalism: You have two cows. You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, … Continue reading

Japan bans porn exports to China in retaliation for seizure of cargo ship


The dispute between China and Japan showed no signs of abatement yesterday, after Japan was reported by domestic media to have taken steps to ban the export of specialist pornography to China. Japan is believed to also be behind the blocking of all porn sites in China, which the Chinese government is reporting as domestic … Continue reading

China’s media abandons search for Japanese link to missing plane


After spending weeks combing through official reports, attending press conferences and interviewing aviation insiders, China’s official news agency Xinhua has officially called off the search for a Japanese link to the disappearance of Malaysian Airlines Flight MH370. On Friday morning, Beijing bureau chief Qian Congmin convened the agency’s top news editors for a special meeting, … Continue reading

John Kerry will seek an audience with Kim Jong-un in North Korea


Secretary of State Kerry has had at least two historic diplomatic successes recently: demanding that Israel give the Palestinians whatever they want in exchange for destruction peace and begging Iran and her Supreme Leader Khamenei to be slightly more discrete about their acquisition and development of nukes. With those successes behind him, having little else to do … Continue reading

China and U.S. amazed that North Korea landed on the Sun


Having been briefed by top security advisers about North Korea’s success in landing an astronaut on the Sun, President Obama today announced his decisive response. China has also bowed to North Korea’s superior technology. On January 21st, a satirical post “appeared at the Waterford Whisper News…” mimicking typical North Korean propaganda; it proclaimed: The State News Agency of … Continue reading

Britain could miss out on crazy, pointless war with China, says important American


Cuts to Britain’s armed forces mean the country will be ‘left on the sidelines’ when America invades China. Robert Gates, former US defence secretary, stressed that Britain would no longer be America’s ‘full crazy partner in war’. He said: “Your military will be dropping food from its only helicopter while the US Marines are surging … Continue reading

China’s lunar rover litters on moon, writes name in Bay of Rainbows


Just days after Jade Rabbit’s historic moon landing, incriminating photos have surfaced which show China’s rover littering and writing its name in the Bay of Rainbows, reigniting an old debate about the behavior of Chinese tourists abroad. Newly released photographs from the Hubble Space Telescope clearly show the rover using tire tracks to write “Jade … Continue reading

China declares Lunar Defence Obliteration Zone


Following the successful launch of its first lunar rover, the Chinese government has declared a defensive zone extending vertically from China into space and encompassing the moon. The Lunar Defense Obliteration Zone, according to newly appointed space minister Wu Houyi, “will protect China’s core interests and interplanetary sovereignty.” All foreign spacecraft, satellites, comets and space debris … Continue reading

Newly discovered ancient maps support Chinese territorial claims


A number of Belgian newspapers today reported a story about the discovery of a number of ancient maps that could offer support for several of China’s territorial claims in South East Asian and other parts of the globe. The maps in question were discovered in the library of Arenberg Château, a 16th century castle now … Continue reading

Fish flee after China claims Bay of Bengal (humour)


In developments that our editor refuses to call fishy, China‘s geopolitical muscle-flexing has led to a major exodus of marine wildlife. Schools of petrified fish were observed to be fleeing in panic moments after Xinhua announced that the Bay of Bengal was now officially part of the South China Sea. This is based on recently … Continue reading

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